We wanted to look good for our wedding. But rather than set some vague goal about “getting in shape” (which we had already been trying to do for the past year), we decided we needed a specific endpoint. We needed something that would provide some ass-kicking focus and motivation.
Our solution? Train for a bodybuilding competition.… Read More Built a Better Body
If you’re a liberal, you might be following the latest election polls with a tiny bit of glee. After all, Donald Trump’s favorability ratings are plummeting. If you’re part of the Never-Trump movement, that’s great news, right?
Actually, no. As disastrous for Trump as these numbers seem to be, consider their flip side …… Read More How Clinton Supporters Hurt Their Own Cause
I’ll even wager that you yourself have friends you didn’t realize are Trump supporters. If you discover one, don’t shame them. Ask them, sincerely and openly, how they came to their decision. Because the ones who are least vocal about their support are probably the ones with the most compelling reasons for actually supporting him. These are the people who get what an asshole he is, yet believe they still need to vote for him. These are the people you should be engaging.
That’s how you change minds, you know. By connecting to them. Not by pounding them into submission.… Read More I Empathize with Trump Supporters (and You Should, too)
A Clinton Presidency represents the old establishment winning yet again. A Trump Presidency represents the people throwing a giant, orange-skinned, tiny-handed middle finger at the establishment.
A Sanders Presidency would have represented the possibility of change, to me at least. Because Sanders is enough of an outsider to challenge the establishment, but also has the experience to maybe, just maybe get something done within it when necessary.… Read More I’m a Sanders Supporter, and I Might Just Vote for Trump
In the weeks since Marley’s death, Biscuit has been acting differently. Before, he would spend most of the day huddled quietly somewhere, but now, he paces around the house, meowing and meowing incessantly (oddly enough, just like Marley used to do). He’s much needier now, too, and actively seeks out affection from Melissa. He even rolls over on his back and lets her scratch him. This is something he never used to do.
Biscuit’s change in behavior has made us wonder if he’s sad or freaked out about Marley. Does he know what happened to him? Is that why he was howling when Marley died? When he wanders around the house now, is he looking for his brother?… Read More Do animals grieve?
That’s the kind of cat Marley was. Crotchety, moody, fickle, grumpy, emo … I’ve got an entire thesaurus of negative terms to describe his personality. That’s why he came to be known simply as #3. No name needed. Just … #3.
And here I am, incredibly bummed out that #3 is gone.
Ironic, isn’t it?… Read More Stupid Pet Deaths
You were one crotchety little cat. And every time you wanted attention or affection from us, it had to be on your terms. But hey, we still loved you. I wonder if Mama and Biscuit will miss you, too.… Read More Farewell, Marley
As opposed to “building a butter body,” which is what it seems like we’ve been doing for the last few years …
The men’s category above is called Physique, and the women’s is called Bikini. Because for the men, it’s all about the physique. And for the women … it’s … all about … the bikini? I guess? I mean, those are $400 bikinis. With sequins on them. So … yeah, I guess it makes sense that it’s all about the bikini.
Not that I’m complaining or anything. The rules of the division mandate that the bikini bottom must cover at least 50% of the glutes. But … well, if you’ve ever been to one of these competitions, let’s just say the judges are clearly not too focused on the math.
Anyway, at least I get to save a ton of money and wear regular swim trunks. Life is so much cheaper when you’re a guy.… Read More Building a Better Body
Kerri and I were classmates in grad school at UCSD. She was the brilliant immunologist who aced every class and earned her PhD in molecular biology in less time than it takes most people to get a bachelor’s. I was … well, let’s just say I was the exact opposite of that. (Hey, someone has to occupy the bottom end of that bell curve.)
Kerri and I became good friends, but after she graduated, she moved across the country, and we lost touch. It wasn’t until 2009 that I found out she had moved back to San Diego years before. Over the next six years, we messaged each other sporadically, and while we both talked about meeting up for a drink sometime to catch up, neither of us really made much of an effort to follow through.… Read More Old Friends
This morning, my latest column for Cracked was published, about the subtle racism that I experience regularly as an Asian-American.
Not surprisingly, some people didn’t quite get the point of the column. And so, I’d like to clear a few things up. Specifically, I want to respond to the comments that I’m whiny or angry or playing the victim by writing the column in the first place. To clarify then:… Read More Further Thoughts on My Subtle Racism Column for Cracked
I thought it would be fun to play a little game of Can You Hum That Film Score?
The rules of the game are simple. I’m going to name off a bunch of films with notable scores, and you’re going to check off the ones you can hum from memory. Not ones where you hear it, and you go, “Oh, that’s from this-and-this movie.” No, you have to have the tune already embedded in your conscious brain. If you can’t hum it from memory, then you can’t vote for it. Simple enough, right?… Read More What’s the Most Memorable Film Score Ever?
The closer something looks like an actual human being, without being an actual human being, the creepier it looks. That’s what the uncanny valley refers to — this dip in our emotional response to a human likeness.… Read More The Uncanny Valley and Why Boca Burgers Are Disgusting
If you’ve never had them, they’re called “egg rolls,” but they’re nothing like the deep fried pork-and-vegetable rolls you get at Chinese restaurants. No, these are cookies, plain and simple. Rolls and rolls of sweet flaky, buttery goodness. I used to eat them straight over the tin, because they’re so crumbly and messy.… Read More Cookie Convergence
Privilege is like body odor: You never notice when you have it, but everyone else sure can smell it on you.
If you’ve ever looked down upon those who haven’t found the same success as you, if you’ve ever blamed their lot in life on their own laziness, then maybe this cartoon will change your perspective somewhat….… Read More The Insidiousness of Privilege
There are assholes on both sides of the political and social spectrum, ready to cry foul at the slightest hint of injustice, eager to pick any fight at any opportunity. These are not people who seek rational discourse and an understanding of the other side’s experiences. These are people who just want to be heard above everyone else, whether or not they have anything worthy of being heard. Most often, they don’t.… Read More I’m surrounded by assholes
Thanks for taking care of that TPS report for us, Mama….… Read More Hard at Work
It’s been a while since I’ve written about my dad. The truth is, there hasn’t been much to write about. Melissa and I saw him last month, when we were in Taiwan. But aside from that, there just isn’t anything to report. He’s still living in the nursing facility and confined to a wheelchair. Physically, he can… Read More The Irony of Contentment
I usually stay middle-of-the-road when it comes to politics, but when I see a breakdown in logic and reason, I always feel compelled to point it out. So here we go….
In light of this latest shooting in South Carolina, you’re probably seeing this argument again. The person espousing this argument may even share a video that shows an innocent person pulling a gun in self-defense.… Read More Why self-defense is a dumb argument against gun control
Sure, I get the confusion. Why must we respect one person’s decision to transform from a man to a woman, but we roll our eyes at another person’s decision to transform from a white person to a black person?
So here’s the answer: It’s not hypocritical in the least bit if you have any understanding of gender identity. And in fact, I realize now that much of the prejudice against Caitlyn stems from a core misunderstanding of the biology of gender. As such, I figured I’d post my reply to my friend here, in the hopes that it will clear up some of this misunderstanding:… Read More Why I can mock Rachel Dolezal and still support Caitlyn Jenner
If the mere idea of Caitlyn Jenner being Caitlyn Jenner makes you uncomfortable, fair enough. If you have no understanding or empathy for the difficulties a transgendered person has to face every single day, that’s your privilege.
But in that case, just own up to your bigotry, okay? Don’t drag our country’s proud servicemen down to your level with false dichotomies.… Read More Is it wrong to call Caitlyn Jenner courageous?
Dennis Hong's Attic 