We wanted to look good for our wedding. But rather than set some vague goal about “getting in shape” (which we had already been trying to do for the past year), we decided we needed a specific endpoint. We needed something that would provide some ass-kicking focus and motivation.
Our solution? Train for a bodybuilding competition.
As opposed to “building a butter body,” which is what it seems like we’ve been doing for the last few years …
The men’s category above is called Physique, and the women’s is called Bikini. Because for the men, it’s all about the physique. And for the women … it’s … all about … the bikini? I guess? I mean, those are $400 bikinis. With sequins on them. So … yeah, I guess it makes sense that it’s all about the bikini.
Not that I’m complaining or anything. The rules of the division mandate that the bikini bottom must cover at least 50% of the glutes. But … well, if you’ve ever been to one of these competitions, let’s just say the judges are clearly not too focused on the math.
Anyway, at least I get to save a ton of money and wear regular swim trunks. Life is so much cheaper when you’re a guy.